Many of you reading this might be navigating your life without fully realizing it's your life to shape. I'll explain, but let me give you some context.
I've been on a personal discovery and improvement journey since I was part of a reduction in force last November. What seemed like a setback turned out to be one of my life's most impactful and transformative experiences.
For the past four years, I've been dedicating myself to ZUP2U, striving to inspire people to be the difference in their lives by embracing their authentic selves. My intentions have always been pure: I genuinely want others to embrace their authentic selves, be their best version, and live their best lives.
But here's the truth: while I was sharing videos, inspiring posts, and writing about how to be the difference in your life, I wasn't living authentically myself.
Yeah, you read that right. I wasn't embodying the authentic self I encouraged others to be. Instead, I was conforming to what I believed others expected of me. I'm doing exactly what I tell everyone not to.
Then came this pivotal moment: Paul, "WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE."
When I heard those words, I was attending the PSI Basic course in Denver, Colorado, and they hit me hard—like a gut punch. I thought to myself, what have I been doing?
I realized I wasn't living authentically, and it was only hurting me. Over the next three days, the PSI seminar helped me take a hard look at my life.
It wasn't until I took an honest and raw look at my life that I realized I'd been fooling myself for a while. I was resisting being myself in fear of being judged, making excuses in my head, and building a solid case of why I shouldn't and couldn't do it. People would make fun of me, think I'm stupid or not smart enough, and so on. I chose to resist; I didn't surrender or change my situation.
Paul, WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
While building this case for resistance, I amassed a pile of resentment at how I've been wronged in my life and was the victim in everything. That was done to me; they hurt me, and they did that to me. I did nothing wrong. I chose to be resentful; I didn't surrender or change my situation.
Once again, Paul, WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
While I was building up all this resistance and resentment in my life, Next came the retaliation/revenge phase. I hope they get what they deserve; what goes around comes around, and I can't wait for them to feel what I feel. I chose to retaliate or get revenge; I didn't choose to surrender or change my situation.
And again, Paul, WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
Digging deep into my life was an emotional and intense journey; simultaneously, it was incredibly uplifting and empowering.
Here's what I discovered when I dug deep into my life.
I realized that all resistance, resentment, and relation/revenge were not serving me. They were holding me back from being my best, authentic self, and they were sabotaging my happiness and fulfillment.
This could be happening to you, too, without you even realizing it. So, buckle up as I share how these three R's can own you, hold you captive, and prevent you from living your best life.
Resistance can be subtle, creeping into your life without notice. When it gets a hold on you, you most likely won't even realize it's happening, and you'll believe that you're in control by resisting. You may resist being on time, following the rules, or doing what your partner asks. You tell yourself; no one tells me what to do; I don't have to follow the rules; I'll make my own or do just enough at work to get by.
All the while thinking this serves and gives you the power and then wondering why your job or relationships are not good. I have news for you: whatever you resist in your life persists. The more you resist, the more it persists and owns you. You're making life more challenging for yourself because YOU chose to resist. You didn't choose to surrender or change your situation.
WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
Next, let's talk about resentments: This is where you feel wronged or that something was done to you that was hurtful, or you thought it was about you. How could they do that to me? Why would they do that to me? Life is unfair, so you resent whomever or whatever, thinking that will serve you and put you in a position of power.
You take all the energy you could be putting into being your best self and use it to hold resentment against someone or something that most likely has no idea or even cares that you're doing this because you think that gives you power. News flash: it doesn't provide you with power; it's quite the opposite: it drains your energy and does not serve you. Again, you chose to be resentful; you didn't choose to surrender or change your situation.
WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
Finally, it's time to serve that cold dish of retaliation/revenge to those you've been resisting and resenting. What does retaliation/revenge look like? I hope they get theirs; they deserve to have what happened to me happen to them. Sometimes, we call that Karma. You may even be thinking I've got those filthy animals right where I want them. It's time to take more energy to fuel the power you think you have, dig your heels in, and because when they get theirs, you will feel much better.
Will you? No, you won't because retaliation/revenge still has you. You will find the next thing to go after because nothing is your fault. Once again, you chose to retaliate or get revenge; you didn't choose to surrender or change your situation.
WELCOME TO YOUR LIFE.
I have a lot of work to do on myself, and I'm just getting started. Part of the process is to work on not being afraid or ashamed of my struggles. This post wasn't the easiest to write because I've let many people down, but most importantly, I let myself down, and I don't want to do that any longer.
I'm proud of myself for doing the work to take the mask off and step into my authentic self. I invite you to do the same, and if you're curious about how I'm doing this, I'm happy to share.
Make it a great day,
Paul
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